Monday, September 12, 2016

Good Girls

In no particular order and no attribution to who said these things to me or in my hearing, here are some things I was taught about good girls:

Good girls don't have sex until they're married.

Good girls don't wear tight clothing, short skirts or low cut shirts. Good girls don't show too much skin.

Good girls don't sit with their legs open.

Good girls eat their greens so they will grow Barbie doll hair.

Good girls don't hang upside down from trees or monkey bars so you can see their underwear.

Good girls are polite and say things like, yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes sir, no sir, please and thank you.

Good girls don't talk back.

Good girls are nice.

Good girls don't walk alone at night. 

Good girls go to church.

Good girls follow the rules and keep quiet.

Good girls are pretty but only because they don't put effort into it.

Good girls are patient.

Good girls keep secrets.

Good girls aim to please.

Good girls will get married and have children.

Good girls want to get married and have children.

Good girls respect authority.

Good girls do what they're told.

Good girls get the highest grades.

Good girls don't stay out too late.

Good girls dont make trouble.

Good girls don't have a problem doing the right thing. They're good. They do what's expected of them.

Good girls don't let their bra straps show. Good girls never go out in public without a bra on.

Good girls dress feminine.

Good girls don't laugh at fart jokes. Or crude jokes.

Good girls don't curse.

Good girls are only friends with other good girls.

Good girls use proper grammar.

Good girls know that if a boy picks on you, it's just because he likes you.

Good girls play hard to get.

Good girls aren't physically violent.

Good girls don't get into arguments.

Good girls know how to and like to cook.

Good girls don't cheat.

Good girls call their grandparents.

Good girls don't laugh too loud.

Good girls don't complain.

Good girls don't get in arguments with their parents.

Good girls don't spit.

Good girls are princesses.

Good girls aren't aggressive.

Good girls don't brag about themselves.

Good girls don't drink or do drugs.

Good girls conform to conventional beauty standards.

Good girls don't kiss and tell.

Good girls don't have one night stands.

Good girls don't even like sex.

Good girls aim to please.

And if someone has sex with another person without consent, that may be called rape, but only if you're a good girl. If you're not, it wasn't rape, it was just sex. 

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