Monday, January 30, 2012

Brief Update from ReOrientation

A poem I wrote during our silence yesterday:

I sit in silence and the dark
My frustration and confusion
Is sometimes overwhelming
Sometimes I can only feel the pain

But I'm not alone

I'm not alone.

The light in the dark
Shines as a beacon of hope

I'm not alone

Shatter the darkness
With the light

We are not alone.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Spirituality Night: The Happiness Project

I led spirituality night last week, and in the spirit of the new year, focused on positive changes to make in our lives. As part of my 50 books I read last year, I read The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. I was inspired by her book to begin my own happiness project, by focusing on what makes me happy. I decided to share a lot of what I learned from the book with my community.

The idea behind the happiness project is to approach happiness as a journey instead of a goal. Change habits so that you can focus on being happy. In our society, success is measured by wealth and not happiness. Happiness is viewed as a luxury that we can only afford if we purchase it. With that mindset, we will never find happiness, because it involves trying to get to a certain point of, "oh, if XYZ happens, THEN I'll be happy." But why wait? Happiness is available to all of us now if we look at things differently.

After first explaining what the Happiness Project was, I read some of the commandments/tips/"secrets of adulthood" for happiness from the book that I thought were useful.

A sampling:
One minute rule: If you can do it in a minute, get it done
Let it go
Just because someone else enjoys something doesn't mean you will, and vice versa
Sing in the morning
Spend ten minutes before you go to bed cleaning
The days are long but the years are short
It's okay to ask for help
Be nice
Always say 'thank you'
You can choose what you do, you can't choose what you LIKE to do
You can do ANYTHING you want, but you can't do EVERYTHING you want
If you're not failing, you're not trying hard enough
Don't keep score
One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make others happy; one of the best ways to make others happy is to be happy yourself
Enjoy the process
Act the way you want to feel

The best resolutions take vague statements like "I want to be a better friend" or "I want to exercise more" or "I want to meet new people," and turn them into concrete goals, like "I will call a friend at least once a week" and "I am going to go to the gym every day" and "I am going to join an organization so I meet people with similar interests."

I then invited my community to reflect on their own about what their own mini happiness project would look like/their own resolutions for 2012. I also wanted everyone to think about happiness and its connection to spirituality (this was spirituality night after all...), and also how they might want to explore their spirituality in the coming year. We journaled for a little while and then came back together for a short discussion. I had everyone share at least one "resolution," because we need to hold each other accountable. I wrapped up with this quote:

Happiness is the spiritual experience of love, grace and gratitude.

For more on the Happiness Project, visit Gretchen Rubin's website.

Soundtrack to the evening:
Surely We Can Change-David Crowder Band
Better Get to Livin'-Dolly Parton
I Was Here-Beyoncé
Be Happy-Mary Mary
Come Awake-David Crowder Band
Let Go-Frou Frou
Shining Like the Sun-Kate Campbell
It's A New

Friday, January 6, 2012

So This is Christmas...

Before we dispersed before the holidays, we had our community Christmas. We decided that we would do Secret Santa, so everyone didn't have to get gifts for everyone. Our second rule is that the gifts had to be made by us. My mom and one of her best friends/adopted godmother send me care packages often and had recently sent me one full of cookie making supplies, so I suggested we do that for another Christmas activity that night.

Casa DK's christmas tree


gingerbread cookie with peppermint icing=so good

Mike H. showing off his cookie creation
It turned out that Sonia got Erica, Erica got Sonia, Mike H got Kevin, Kevin got Mike P, Mike P got Mike H, Jackie got me, and I got Jackie. We got some fun gifts :)

Thursday, January 5, 2012


Happy New Year everyone!

I greeted the new year in North Carolina once again, watching Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin on CNN and hanging out with my parents, neighbors and eggnog. :)

I had a wonderful Christmas, which I will recap in a later post, and really enjoyed staying in both homes of Austin and Durham. I spent time with my family, my dear friends, and eating at all my favorite spots.

I've been back in LA for about 48 hours. I missed my housemates a lot, so I'm really glad to be reunited. At work this week, the kids aren't back in school yet, which reminds me just how boring an all day desk job really is, and how much I miss them! School starts back on Monday and I can't wait to see the kids.

I've made quite a few "resolutions" this year that I am hoping will make me happier and healthier. I will be dancing much more (which has been the biggest thing missing in my life in LA), be more organized and be nicer. I am the queen of snarky comments and eye rolling, and it really doesn't add much to my quality of life, so I'm going to try to start being nicer for a change.

Another post is coming about resolutions/happiness, so I will write more about that. You have any resolutions for the year? (Remember to be concrete, not vague!)